I checked my watch.
It was quarter past 5 and I was ready to call it a day. It
has been hectic than usual. Not that therapists have any particular season of
clients coming up a lot, but affording a breath for myself seemed a tough job
that day. I picked up all my stuffs and was about to leave when I heard a knock
on door.
“Are you Dr Wills?” the person enquired.
“Yes I am. And you are?” I asked him.
“Your client for…I don’t know how long.”
“Look sir, I don’t think if I am left with any appointment
for today so I would really appreciate if you can…”
“Hasn’t the hippocratic oath been in your practice lately? Because
I can clearly see you breaking it.” He interrupted subtly.
People over here never talk to me like that. I have no pride
for the profession I am known for but dealing an absolute deadpan was not how I
expected to end my day. What sort of depression can he be into? I thought of
letting go of his behaviour and sit with him for a session. The family were at
my in-laws’ anyways so I had to be at home alone. I decided to stay up for yet another
counselling.
“Yes indeed.” The man replied.
“So let’s just start from the beginning. What is your name,
what you do, and what occurred you to seek my help?”
“Let’s just get straight into it shall we? What’s in the name
and profession anyway!” he responded.
He smelt cigarettes and rum.
His pretenseless replies were not much of a surprise to me. I
have had many clients like that before. Despite being so disturbing, this
person had somewhat of a charisma which was intriguing at the same time. I
could see him hide his face with those collars of a high-end British jacket as
if he was trying to cover it from something.
“I think it would be more convenient for me to communicate if we
can rather talk face to face. I assure that you can be comfortable here. If privacy
is a concern, I never disclose my client’s….”
“I really wouldn’t mind but after contracting some allergic
condition on my cheek, I prefer not to show it for the moment. Will that be
okay if we can just talk like this?”
He interrupted me for the second time.
“Fine, it will do.” I said.
For a brief moment, he was quite. He wanted to say something
but couldn’t. I knew insisting him to do so won’t help so I gave him space.
Eventually he would speak up I knew. Moments later, he started talking.
“Have you ever loved someone, doctor?”
Okay, now I knew where this was going.
“We all have, at least once.”
“And what if it turns out to be a wrong thing to do?”
“Loving can never be a wrong thing to do.”
“Even if you fail at it?”
“Even if you fail at it a 100 times. Never give up on love.”
I said.
He was awestruck with my perception on being so optimistic
about LOVE. That how I didn’t intend to doubt the concept irrespective of how
many times we fail at it. Well, I would say experience made me feel like this
today. Like I felt for all the wrong relationships in the past only to come to
a closure that life is not tailor-made. We are born to embrace such sort of
things. We had our moment with the person and we went on to give that relation,
the best justification we probably could.
Showed our loyalty, our commitment and of course love. Sometimes, it
doesn’t work and sometimes it does wonders. Sometimes, the person not even feel
the same way we do. But failing at it isn’t the end of the world.
He was taken for silence. He didn’t say a word. It was hell
of a speech I would say. But given the person with such a temperament who is
still shy to show off his face, I really doubt that he will be convinced so
soon. And yes, I was right.
“You really seem to try a lot in getting your clients back to
normalcy” he exclaimed.
“It is my job after all. And ‘bringing to normalcy’ is a
strong word. Getting through a heartbreak is something we have all dealt with
at some point in our lives. It’s just how we react to it. Some prefer not to be
too carried away by it and just move on in lives looking for something better.
Some prefer to hold back and eventually ruin their life in the worst way they
possibly can. But the most courageous of the lot are the people like you who instead
of taking up all the pain to themselves, decides to come and seek proper
counselling.”
“It actually took a lot more than you could imagine for
knocking that door. I thought maybe a therapy would be a bad idea after all.”
He said.
“It’s never a bad idea. Have you tried talking to your
family….or friends before coming here? I believe people closer to you can be a
better therapist than a professional like me.”
“Family? Well I don’t have one. Or, let’s pretend like I
don’t have a family.”
“You see, if you can’t love people who brought you in this
world, then trying to love someone who you have met later in your life, would
be quite difficult to do. You need to love the people first who taught you to
appreciate its value in the first place.
For the moment, I felt like I was more of a philosopher than
a therapist. Maybe, I was getting biased with what the person had to say about
his life because I found it relatable. What I wanted to do to him was embrace
him and tell him that the world is after all not that of a bad place to live. It’s
just that we are yet to be lucky enough to meet the people who appreciates our
value. With time, life will turn out to be blissful as it was earlier.
But my job didn’t allow me to make it personal with clients.
I had to counsel in the most formal way I can. But I could clearly see he
wasn’t getting it. Or should I say, his pains and grief were too resolute to
let go. He wanted to subdue his past but couldn’t. I could distinctly see
myself failing as a therapist in getting my job done. I gave my last try.
“You know Kevin Joe is here for tonight?”
The person was absolutely bewildered hearing the name I
mentioned suddenly out of context.
“Kevin Joe?”
“Yes. The stage artist and a humourist. Haven’t you heard of
this name before? He is more likely a celebrated person here.”
“Yes I have heard this name before. What do you think of him?
“Well, I have never been to any of his shows before or never
saw him to say the least. It’s his first show in this town. Although I think he
is being over-rated a little bit.” I placed my opinion.
He asked me why.
“Maybe because this generation is yet to see some legitimate
comedians like him. So he being the only artist is trying to steal all of the
lime-light. Not that he don’t deserve it but he is just too famous for being a
comedian. Like who makes a profession out of making political jokes.” I
laughed.
“Yes. You are right doctor. Not everyone can’t be as gifted
as doing the noble job like you.”
I wondered whether he was being sarcastic but excused him for
what he was going through.
“Anyways, what’s with Kevin Joe?” he asked.
“Yea, sorry I forgot. He is doing a show here tonight and I
think you need to go there. His performance may not help you get out of your
misery of course but I can assure it will help you ease of the pain for a time
being.”
“I thought you are not a fan of this comedian but.”
“That I will figure after the show tonight. My kid bought a
ticket to his show but now that he is out of town, I guess I will need to do
something with it.”
“Sounds like a plan. Thanks for the advice. I really
appreciate it.”
“It’s okay. That’s my job. But next time it would be much
better if you came here with an appointment.”
“Yes, apologies for that. Wish I could have made a better
impression.”
“Never-mind. I can understand.”
I was wondering whether he would really show up tonight. So I
tried asking him about it.
“I guess we will see each other around then?”
“Can’t say about it, to be honest.” He blatantly responded.
I was convinced he won’t turn up for the evening. I was a bit
disappointed. I couldn’t give him what he deserved. I could say I didn’t get
much time to study his case properly, but my intent as a therapist to never let
my client leave the room with a blunt expression was not fulfilled that day. He
didn’t even say if he would ever visit me again. I was lost in my thoughts that
I didn’t realize he had left already. With all of my thoughts and stuffs, I
locked the clinic and left too.
Click here to know what happens next
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